(for Jelani)

Longing for the meaning of life
while breathing day in and day out
realize how slight it is
keep an eye on the universe at night

What would you give to live your life again?
What would you change with a second chance?
And could you learn from the mistakes? I don't know


The babe had dark hair, no more than dark. Black hair, and white skin. Except where it was black that was. The markings had been present at birth, face markings proving to one and all who she was, who's she was. And if that didn't do it, those bright red eyes, seeing everything, missing nothing proved it beyond all doubt.

But there she was, and there she played in the yard, while two stood near who watched as she pulled up blades of grass. They watched as her eyes caught sight of a butterfly and the little one tracked it over the tops of flowers and off into the distance. And they listened as she laughed delighted, and went back to her playing, happy in her little piece of the world.

"What if she wants to be like me?" One voice asked, light and soft, filled with love and concern. "Are you going to let her be who she wants to be, can you live with that in your child?"

"Tha question is, sweetcheeks." Came a lower voice, rough, dark in its tone and darker in it's attitude. "What if the brat want's to be like me? What'cha gonna do then? You gonna let 'er be who she wants to be, Leel's?"

There was a pause, and the scent of exhaled cigar smoke drifted over the lawn, causing the child to raise her head, shake it suddenly a few times and sneeze before going back to her play. "You love 'er, but can you love 'er enough to let her go and be who she want's to be?"

There was silence for a while, as much silence as there could be with the wind blowing, the birds calling, and the bright laughter of a babe on a summer day. Then finally came the answer, quiet and subdued.

"Yes."

Leela,
Fandom: Lobo, DC Comics OC
Words: 326

She'd done everything asked of her, right down the line. Anything, everything the Doc's said (and there were a few of them that her husband had brought her to) poking and prying at her until she felt she wanted to scream! She couldn't go on bounty runs, couldn't do interplanetary pickups, hell, if he could have found a way to wrap her in bubble tape he would have. But she dealt with it, sometimes calmly, most times not, because every now and then she'd catch him looking at her, focussing on her growing stomach, that look of concern and anger and perhaps just a hint of fear. So Leela resolved to toe the line this time and nothing but nothing was going to upset her health, or that of her newest unborn child.


So the house now looked like a damned jungle, flowers and vines and growing things everywhere. Jelani would come and go to visit, shaking her head and thanking the stars that she took after her father more than her mother.

The sex was great, had been great up until a few weeks ago when the last doctor had stated that it might not be good for the baby. After that, all hell broke loose. Why? Because Leela got cranky. Finally Lobo took to going on long bounty runs, getting him out of the house and away from his wife. It was safer this way, he reasoned with her as he pulled the hook out of the stomach of the last doctor, the one that had said 'no sex' to them. If he was gone, he wouldn't see her, so he wouldn't want to touch her. If he didn't touch her, that meant she couldn't touch him. And if they didnt' touch each other, then they wouldn't be able to have sex, right? So she was miserable, and home. And he was off someplace in the galaxy, and probably miserable too.

This morning Leela had woken up, one arm curled around her stomach, feeling an ache deep inside. Heartburn she thought, or indigestion maybe? It came and went as the day went on, the pains becoming more intense and closer together until finally she had to sit down in her garden, realizing at last what was actually going on. Labor, she was in labor and Lobo was no where to be found.

Picking herself up, Leela hobbled into the kitchen, reaching for the phone. "Jelani? Jelani pick up the phone please."

Most days Leela would be up and gone. The less she was around Lobo, the less he would have a reason to scowl at her stomach. And with her glow? It was a wonder that he didn't start wearing a mask to bed at night, just to get some sleep. Or sleeping someplace else.

Today however, she simply couldn't get out of bed like she'd wanted to. So she said 'screw it' and slept in. Slept until the sun was up in fact. Too late to get a head start on bounty hunting, or tracking today, and the garden had looked pretty damned overgrown and wild anyhow. So Leela decided to stay home and hit the garden to prune some of that wild riot of flowers back to manageable size. As she bent over her roses, she thought crossly to herself that this was simply another one of her gifts, had to remember it was a gift not a curse. The fact that she couldn't stop being a damned lightbulb for the most part, and the fact that everywhere she went, flowers sprouted up around her like wildfire. Gift, not curse, gift not curse, yea right.

Still, it was sunny and the wind was warm. Leela stopped to pull the edge of her near-translucent green gown off of a thorn, her fingers a soft gold against the brilliant dark leaves and violet petals. Humming softly to herself, the pregnant demigoddess cupped a rose bud in her hands and breathed on it, opening it to a brilliant full bloom. She never heard the doors open and shutting in the house behind her, letting her know her daughter was home.

She'd been avoiding it for weeks. Wearing long sleeves and avoiding her long flowing Isketian robes, going off on the furthest reaching, least paying bounty runs to get out of the house and away from her husband. Anything to avoid that day when he looked closely enough at her to realize the truth, that she was pregnant again.

Today she had zoomed by the house on her bike, making sure his chopper wasn't around before stopping. From the garage it was only a few moments to get in the house and up into her study. A quick shower and a bite of food was what she needed right now, she was grubby and blood spattered from her last run. And it really wasn't worth it for the money, but the time away from the upcoming discussion was priceless. Besides, she was running so much that she'd been missing meals, and that wasn't good for her or the child.

Into the shower, just a quick on, just to get the dirt off. The rushing stream warm water was heaven to her skin, and without realizing it she relaxed, rested against the wall and soaked in the liquid massage on her back.

Fraggin' hell. Don't remember bein' sick a damn day in my life, but now I can't stop puking my guts out. Every goddam day. Should I tell him? Nah, if I'm sick I'll just get over it. No sense in riling him up, I'll just go rest in the sunroom for a while.

"Hey Lover, here's your pillow and an extra blanket. Pleasant dreams on the couch. And its just so sad, I was sooo looking forward to doing whatever your warped and utterly perverse mind could think of. But, c'est la vie!" With a grin she tosses down the pillow.

((Cover your eyes kiddies, this is about to get NC 17 very quickly))

How can you just lose a Child? What the hell. You've known her all her life, you've had her scent since the day she was born. And now you can't find her?

Some bountyhunter you are. If I find out something's happened to her, I'm going to string you up by your entrails. And this time it won't be for fun.